Free to Say "NO"

Hey Sis,

Let me tell you something: I had several panic attacks last week.

Yes, me. 

You see, I was offered another substitute position in my current school that was paying way more money than my previous substitute position. You already know that I took it. I was looking at the money but not the case load. It was Special Education Math teacher. Truth be told, I had no business taking this assignment. #1 – It was Special Ed, something I had never done before and #2 – I hate math. I should have said “NO” from jump street.

On top of that, I was hit with the flu, my daughter had the States cheer competition that was 2 hours away, I was faced with several deadlines and had to cover 2 events within days of each other.

Simply put, I was “doing the MOST”.

Well, it all came crashing down with this new job assignment. I was up every night last week. My stomach started hurting and I was waking up dreading going to work. Been there, done that and wrote a blog post about it.  Click HERE to read it.

I struggled with staying on until the end of the school year, or walking away. I chatted with the hubby and he agreed, my sanity was way more important than this assignment. I gathered the courage to email the principal Monday night. I told her, I was rescinding my acceptance of the offer and that I would stay until Friday.

The minute I hit send, my anxiety shot all the way down. I did feel a little prick of it Tuesday morning, but I took a deep breath and kept it moving.

This was the 1st time in my life where I did not struggle with saying “NO”. For years, I felt paralyzed and trapped and stayed in things I was to move away from. These aren’t bad things, on the contrary, they were good things. However, my season was long over in many but I was not Free to say “No”.

2018 is my year to be FREE!!!! I will use my “No” to serve me. I don’t care what it is, my “No” leads to peace. My “NO” leads to joy. My “No” keeps me sane.

I will use my “No” to be free!