Reconciliation

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I yell at the mountain tops that I am BLACK or do I act like my blackness doesn’t matter so I don’t offend white people?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I check my coworker when they use microaggressions towards me or do I silently play it off like I didn’t notice?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I politely tell my Big Momma that I am not pinching my baby’s nose so it won’t be flat and broad or do I whisper in his ear how beautiful he is?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I warn my Black son to keep his hands off a white girl so he is not blamed of rape or do I tell him he can love anybody he wants without fear of retaliation?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I tell my aunties that all hair is good hair or do I ignore them when they make comments about my baby’s nappy hair?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I tell my daughter to let them know she doesn’t want their catcalls when she walks by or do I hope she taps into her moxy and knows to walk in the other direction when she sees them coming.

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I use skin bleaching cream to make me light-skinned, so men will look at me or do I brighten up my filter when I post my pictures to the ‘gram?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I tell my husband to be careful every time he gets in the car or do I hold my breath and say a little prayer for him to return back to his family without being detained or killed by the police?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I ask my “white” friend what she means by, “you don’t talk like a Black girl”, or do I code-switch to make her more comfortable with the way I talk?

How do I reconcile my blackness in the 21st century? Do I allow the white woman to touch my grandson’s hair when they comment about how curly it is or do I pretend like I didn’t hear her and keep on walking?

Hell no! I will not compromise my blackness to make others comfortable.

I will confront them and make them face their own biases whether they are offended or not. White? Black? It don’t matter.

What matters is that I live authentically and command respect from those around me.