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Writing can be a lifeline, especially when your existence has been denied, especially when you have been left on the margins, especially when your life and process of growth have been subjected to attempts at strangulation.
— Micere Githae Mugo

When Your Pain Becomes Your Purpose

As I was shopping the other day, I heard someone shouting my name from down the aisle. I looked around and there was this lady smiling at me and calling my name. I timidly walked over to her since I did not recognize her. She had a big smile on her face as she clearly knew who I was. I was running the memory machine for those few seconds as I got close enough to her but I was drawing a blank.

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She said, "OMG! You are Tanya Barnett from that show on OWN!" I immediately thought to myself, "Is someone calling my name?", but it quickly registered that she was calling me. She walked up, and asked if she could hug me. I said, “Sure”, hugged her back. I felt extremely awkward and nervous because I had no idea who she was. She proceeded to tell me that we never met but how my appearance on Black Love and my social media messages have blessed her tremendously.

It took everything within me not to cry. I had no idea the girl who was always, but barely chosen last for kick ball and dodge-ball would be an inspiration. I was  overwhelmed that the years of pain and shame I felt behind being a 19 year old pregnant, college drop-out and baby mama reject were building me up for such a time as this. The years of asking God why I had a marriage from "hell", made this one moment in time worth every minute of it.

I asked her name and listened intently as she shared her current, painful situation. I offered her hope and encouragement to find a prayer partner to pray with her through her trying marriage.

We hugged again as we parted ways. Each step to my car, was a struggle to hold back the tears. Once I got in it, the floodgates opened. I cried in my car as I thanked God for using my pain for purpose. My pain made me a stronger woman who is now, giving to hope and a bright future to other women. God pricked my heart to run back in the store to give her a copy of my book. I prayed that God will give her the strength to get through her tough time so she can eventually help someone else through theirs.

How have you turned your pain into His Purpose? If you have already, I would love to know what it was?

Vedia BarnettComment